The whole Universe is a hot, beautiful mess. Why should you be any different?
Category: Life Musings
nobody special
Baldie Vlog + Thank You
Update on my bald (am I still bald?) ‘do and a warm thank you to the 12000+ people who read my open letter to America regarding Trayvon Martin.
And yes, I know I say “uhhmm” 400 times in this video.
No Hair. Don’t Care. My New (Bald) Look
If you follow this blog closely, you’ll know that I’ve been progressively letting go of my egoic attachment to hair. Earlier this year I did a big chop — with a pair of scissors, that resulted in 2/3 of my hair ending up on my bathroom floor.

Going short felt liberating. But something in me wanted to go all the way. It was not so much a question of if, as when. While visiting Thich Nhat Hanh’s Blue Cliff Monastery a few months ago, I spent some time with a few Buddhist nuns — women who deeply impressed me, not only with their wisdom and spiritual strength but also with their bald heads.

I’ve loved my shorter hair – so much so that I’ve documented the transformation with an endless stream of selfies that I periodically post on twitter. But all good things must come to an end.
As we’ve moved ever more deeply into the bowels of global warming the hottest summer ever, my fro, even in its diminished form, has just felt like too much to bear. It’s been really fucking hot on the East Coast this week. We’re talking day after day of 95+ with intense humidity. Even with just 1/3 of my hair on my head, my curly fro was a heat magnet. Yes, it was low maintenance — shower ‘n go — but I had to deal with all that heat stuck up in my head . . . and I’d wake up looking like Don King. Not that there’s anything wrong with Don King, but it really just wasn’t the “good morning” I was looking for.
Anywho, last night it occurred to me: If I’m tired of my hair, why am I still wearing it? What is keeping me from the big shave? In a flurry of excitement, I decided that I would go to the barber first thing in the morning. I almost attempted to shave it myself but, with five inches of hair on my head, and no barber skills whatsoever, reason won over enthusiasm.
It didn’t really feel like a decision so much as it felt like a calling. I was simply compelled to do it. If I have to come up with reasons, we could say it was personal, weather related and spiritual. For sure, it is a way of sacrificing a little more vanity (though I still have wellsprings where that came from) and practicing even more non-attachment to my pre-conceived notions of what beauty and femininity are all about. But really, there was no one reason. It just finally felt right.
So, here it is. My new look – and my first time being bald since I was a fetus. I was born with hair so this is literally the only time post-womb that I have moved about on Earth with an unencumbered scalp. It’s like meeting myself for the first time. I love it — and I love me, for having the courage to experience this freedom.
Love yourself
Love yourself like you matter.
Home Improvements: Organization
Organization has never been my strong suit. That said, I’ve found myself progressively filled with the Spirit-of-Getting-Shit-Together ever since moving into my apartment. That Spirit, however, has moved rather slowly. The fact that my closets have been pristine and organized for the last year is a first in the history of my short life and nothing less than a monumental achievement. Most of my rooms are usually in a state of order. But there have been certain spaces — drawers and cabinets — that remained in a perpetual state of disarray.

In any case, over the last week, I’ve set about slowly bringing order to the chaos. One of my perpetual problems was not having a dedicated space for tools. I had a hammer under a table, another one in the pantry, screw drivers in the kitchen, nails and screws running wild and free in various containers and drawers. It was just awful. It occurred to me that the magical invention of the toolbox would solve all my worries. Amazingly, I had never, ever, owned a toolbox in my entire adult life.



Anyway, enjoy these before and after pics of the wondrous transformation taking place within my space. Oh and go read this fabulous book by Julie Morgenstern – “Organizing from the Inside Out”. It was recommended to me by my colleague, fellow blogger and new friend Tanya Golash-Boza. Started reading it yesterday and I’m loving it. I’ll need all the help I can get when I start working on my next organizational projects: 1) getting my filing system in order and 2) making the attic a functional space.

Home Improvements: Laundry Room Rehab
I’ve been living in my apartment for a year and a half. It’s taken that entire length of time to get all of my rooms fully furnished and decorated. Two rooms — my office and my laundry room — were ongoing disaster zones. Last winter, I finally found the energy and ingenuity to get my office situated and beautified.
The laundry room, however, lingered in disarray. It’s hard for me to convey just how awful it was. Imagine a beautiful space — hardwood floors, full length mirror, plenty of natural light, with a washer/dryer stacked in a recessed corner — strewn with clothes, shoes and assorted crap. I had to pinch pennies last year, so furnishing this room was not an option. All I had in there was a lonely ironing board, a makeshift cabinet that I found in the attic and hampers of various shapes, colors and sizes. It was a hot mess.
Every time I entered that space, I felt a micro-moment of tension and stress. My chest tightened, my breath caught in my lungs. A little self loathing caught in my throat. Finally, a few weeks ago, my budget allowed a little room to get my shit together. So I set to work trying to figure out what to do with the space.
The room itself is kind of an odd space to wrap your head around. It’s pretty small – about 9 by 10 feet. On the upside, there’s a closet and the washer and dryer are flush with the wall, making them, in principle, unobtrusive. I knew I didn’t want the room to just be used for folding and ironing clothes. For a long time, I dreamed of turning it into a boudoir, complete with a fainting sofa, a shag rug and, oh I don’t know, something kitsch like a mannequin. But I also wanted a legitimate guest room. Could I possibly do both?
It occurred to me that I needed a guestroom more than a boudoir and a futon would get the job done. But I also needed this room to serve another functional purpose–storing my clothes. After a year of hardcore thrifting, my wardrobe had quadrupled. Both of my closets were filled to the brim with clothes, which is why I often had things piling up in the laundry room. It became clear to me that I needed a real chest of drawers. So I went to St. Vincent de Paul – my favorite thrift store for finding beautiful furniture. Not only did I find a fabulous futon — complete with wooden frame and a new, sealed mattress — but I also found a new, matching chest of drawers. Both items were being sold at about 50% the cost of retail. I was a little concerned about two things: 1) that the room would feel crowded with the futon open and 2) the fact that I didn’t have space for an end table. But it all worked out rather beautifully. With the futon open, the room feels cozy and the chest itself serves as a nice “side table” to place your belongings.
With the furnishing issue solved, I now turned my attention to the laundry facilities themselves. The washer and dryer were an eyesore. What to do? For a long time I’d envisioned covering them with a curtain, but not being very handy, I was unsure of how to make this happen. I knew I needed a rod that would curve on one end and connect directly into the wall on the other. So I took a trip to Home Dept and described what I had in mind to one of their awesome assistants. She suggested a getting a regular curtain rod and flatting out one of the ends so that it could go straight into the wall. That cost me all of about $1.50.

For the decor, I got just about everything from Kmart and the thrift shop. Found some cute curtains and pillows to match the futon and got a gorgeous, opaque, floor-to-ceiling curtain to cover the washer and dryer. For the chest, I found a neutral table runner, a little vanity mirror, a fountain and lamp. My absolute favorite addition is the “jewelry” box I contrived from stackable plastic containers I found at Kmart. Storing my (costume) jewelry was a big problem. I had a real jewelry box, but it was so tiny that it could only fit a fraction of my earrings. I also disliked the little jewelry box because you had to open up every compartment to see what was in there – and frankly, I ain’t got time for that. For a year and a half, I’d gotten by with piling up my earrings, necklaces and bracelets on the window sill of my bathroom. That worked for a while, but I started to run out of room and earrings would routinely fall on the floor, behind the sink and into oblivion. I needed a system for organizing the jewelry that would not only keep everything orderly and accessible, but would also allow me to easily see everything I had. The stackable, transparent box I have now perfectly fits my needs and is aesthetically quite pleasing to the eye.
I’m also obsessed with this pretty macramé plant hanger I found at Home Depot. Another sales assistant gave me this kickass idea when I told him I was looking for a pot. The lush green of the plant suspended by the window adds a touch of natural beauty that really sets the room off.

So yeah, I could not be more pleased with this space now. I smile every time I do the laundry, pulling back the curtain for the “big reveal”. The chest has solved my clutter problem – now all of my clothes have a home. The futon is comfy, the space is functional. The whole vibe is boho beautiful. And Zora has another room to layer with cat dander. Purrfect.
*And yes, I know I have to fix the curtain rod behind the futon, which has been warped due to outrageously disorderly conduct by the guilty-looking feline pictured above.
Tulip Festival
Tulips make me happy.
Have you ever seen anything so perfect? So effortlessly beautiful?
The colors . . . the textures. Have you ever touched a tulip? Caressed its petals? Communed with its spirit?
Wait. Scroll back up. Did you see that yellow? I mean . . . Lord. Have mercy.
To imagine: the Big Bang banged Itself into a tulip. A million tulips. And it also banged Itself into you and me. How awesome is that.
I love how bad-ass tulips are with their beauty. They jut out the earth, crowned in all their glory on some: “Yeah, I’m gorgeous and amazing. What?”
Alive
If you’d like a reminder of your own aliveness, take a lemon, cut it in half and squeeze it directly into your mouth.
10 Reasons to Stop Apologizing for Your Online Life
Appropriately enough, a Twitter friend shared this TEDx video by Alexandra Samuel on the topic of “online” and “offline” relationships.











































